Love. Simply defined as “a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person” or “a feeling of warm personal attachment.” Not something you would use alongside the word fight. However, all too often, that is exactly what happens.
If you love me, then fight for me. I’m fighting for our love. I’ve been fighting for you, can’t you see that I love you?
To me, this makes absolutely no sense at all.
Fight…and love. Love… and fight.
Going purely by definition, why is love something you have to fight for? Love is the greatest commandment. It conquers all. Who are we to fight for it? Isn’t that a slap in the face to love?
I think that too often, we become possessive. Not of the person we love, but of love itself. Instead of it being a gift, it becomes something that we think we create. And once we start creating, we become possessive.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I understand completely that love is a commitment. It’s not a culmination of butterflies in our stomach and it is most certainly not something we conjure up like a protein shake in the blender.
So when are we going to let go and let love work its magic?
Work. Now that is a much better word to use than fight. Love is something that we have to work at. Much like that commitment I made to go to the gym every day. If I don’t work up the gumption to honor that commitment, well, let’s just say I will be adding elastic to my pants.
Fight has such a condescending tone to it. Ding, ding and I’m coming out of the corner with anger in my heart, swinging like a mad woman. This is not the image I want flashing through my mind when I think of my sweetheart.
Many think that you fight for love because “it’s us against the world.” Since when did the world care if you were together or not? I can guarantee you that they are not digging potholes or setting up snares to trap you or make you stumble.
And when did the love you share with someone become a competition with every other couple in the world. There are no awards for cutest couple or strongest love or even a “wow-those-two-are-the-ultimate-fighters” acknowledgment.
So why are we in the ring?
Put the gloves down, get out and just enjoy the love you share.
Now, of course, couples fight with each other occasionally, but they love even more strongly.
Whoops… looks like I used love and fight in the same sentence…